awritinglilypea (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
awritinglilypea) wrote2007-11-16 08:31 pm
awritinglilypea) wrote2007-11-16 08:31 pm
VMars Fic: Going Somewhere 2/?
Title: Going Somewhere
Fandom: Veronica Mars
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: The disclaimer can be found in my profile. To put it simply don't own, don't sue.
Summary: Veronica has had a lot to think about lately, and when she runs into Weevil one day in the hallway she finds she has a lot more to think about, like why she can't stop watching him no matter what he does.
It made him sick to even think about her this way because somehow, in his own naïve way at the moment he had loved Lilly, loved how much life had filled her, made him feel like he could be in her world, a world where everyone just lived and had fun without thinking of the consequences. Sometimes when he closed his eyes he could see her body, lifeless and so completely wrong next to the Kane’s pool, a pool where she had made him skinny dip and done decidedly unconventional things with him underwater other then swimming and there she had been, across computer screens all over the school, murdered by someone who didn’t even deserve to lick the bottom of her expensive shoes. Aaron Echolls, to look at him Weevil almost understood why Logan was so fucked up, why he had no idea of how to treat a girl, especially a girl as special as V. Logan hadn’t even really known how to handle Lilly and Weevil tried not to think about that too much, that maybe if Aaron hadn’t fucked up his son so much, then Logan and Lilly would have stopped playing their little games. The what ifs that swam through his head were endless at times it seemed, because maybe if they hadn’t played those games and Weevil had never slept with Lilly, hadn’t helped her cheat, she wouldn’t have gone to Aaron and would have stayed with Logan and never would have died. Despite himself he knows that this cannot be true, that although he can be blamed for a lot that went wrong in Neptune he didn’t have anything to do with how Lilly died, she had done whatever she wanted to do.
He remembered the first time he had seen her, he hadn’t actually thought she was anything special, she was a tiny little thing at the age of thirteen and he was more distracted by the girl who had been with her. Veronica Mars, her knees scraped from playing soccer, kicking the ball around the yard, he had caught it when she kicked it out-of-bounds and gave it back to her, his curly hair falling into his eyes. She had thanked him, those pretty eyes sparkling and her cheeks flushing as she took it from him. He’d opened his mouth to reply when Chardo walked over, quickly rushing him away from the white girl and back to the rest of the junior PCH, within a week he was no longer junior anymore; His head was shaved and he was brought in, just in time for freshman year, just in time for him to be bred into a leader. But he could never forget looking back and seeing Lilly teasing Veronica, the younger girl’s cheeks a flaming red and he wanted to run over and protect her because he knew girls like Lilly in his neighborhood, they wouldn’t let up ever. In the end though Lilly had come after him, wanting an out from her relationship with Logan apparently, even though she never really ended up telling Echolls about them, wanting to keep it her little secret. Her dirty little secret. It wasn’t until she died that he got to actually say a word to Veronica Mars again, and when he had he’d been surprised, she had fire behind her eyes and a passion that he had never expected. It had intrigued him day one, when he had offered her a ride on his hog.
Sometimes when Eli was alone he would close his eyes and imagine what it would feel like to be good enough for girls like Lilly, girls like Veronica Mars. They were the type of girl who had a degree of class, girls who would end up going some place in the world without what they had done in the past coming back to haunt them like it could him. Lilly could’ve gotten away from Neptune eventually, he imagined she would have been an actress or something just as good, possibly a model as she had been good looking enough for either job and she certainly did have a flair for the dramatic. He thinks on the odd occasion that she would have loved the circus that surrounded her death, how everyone got involved and everyone was a suspect except the man who had actually killed her, till the very end when shy little Veronica had solved the case. On the other hand he figures that Lilly would have given Duncan and Echolls shit for the way they had treated her, allowed her to be walked all over by everyone who had once claimed to be her friend. It all came down to the facts, Lilly may not have loved him, and she may not have loved Logan but she had loved and treasured Veronica, wanting to change her into something greater and in a way Lilly had changed her into something greater, just maybe not the way she had planned to. And of course when he thought of Lilly his thoughts automatically turned to Veronica, he found himself thinking of her when he was working more often then not, remembering that day so that seemed like a million years ago when she pulled out her first “Get out of Jail free” card for him, one of many and he’d been so happy that she’d cared, that she had his back that he couldn’t resist giving her a little love. She’d smelt of shampoo, and peaches, something that seemed to match her complexion, not that he would ever mention that to anyone.
Weevil tried not to fall for her like he had for Lilly, knowing he couldn’t stand to be used again like he had in the past, it was just too hard for him to handle again. He knew Veronica would never deliberately try and hurt one of his friends yet it seemed to happen every so often, like she got so involved in the cases and studying the people around her that she forgot that sometimes people did trust others enough to simply answer questions. Everything was a puzzle to be worked out for Veronica Mars, and he had to admit that he now found it more endearing then annoying. Despite himself, and his mind’s need to keep his heart in tact his heart just wasn’t listening to him and even though he knew it would get him in trouble one day, most likely with the law he was unable to stop himself from jumping when she asked him to. He tried, he really did but even when she called him to cube of all people, Madison Sinclair’s care he could hear the anger in her voice and practically picture that infuriating head tilt and couldn’t stop himself from caving. It wasn’t until a little while later when he ran into her in the hallway and saw how tired she looked that he felt guilty for having avoided their twice weekly lunches in an effort to forget his feelings for her. He couldn’t resist saying yes to her and next thing he knew he was also going to her house to take care of her because she just looked plain sick and tired of everything going on, he definitely couldn’t say no to her and right now didn’t want to because he realized she considered him to uncomplicated, showed how little she actually knew about him, how much he hid from her, yet couldn’t hide from him.
Weevil led the way out to the car this time, holding the door open from her he slipped an arm around her waist when she seemed to stumble, falling against his side. He ignored the thrill that went up his spine and tightened his arm around her shoulders in comfort, “Give me the keys V,” He instructed, peering down into her face he squinted trying to see if she was really sick, if she felt hot to the touch without her actually realizing what she was doing. “I’ll drive, prefer to get home in one piece and the Sheriff would kill me if you didn’t.” He teased lightly, knowing she didn’t really take well to being ordered around.
Veronica didn’t say anything, just leaned into him, a testament to how exhausted she was. She fished in her pocket for a moment, a look of confusion on his face that was so cute that the need to kiss her, not even on the lips was almost unbearable for him. Eventually she found them in her bag and pressed the unlock button before giving them to him and climbing into the passenger seat of the SUV.
Fingering the keys for a moment Weevil took a deep breath before climbing into the SUV as well; sliding the key into the ignition he smiled at her briefly, having never seen her like this. She looked like she was ready to bury herself in the covers of her bed and never come out, he’d heard Fennel joke around that Veronica Mars was nothing but a marshmallow but hadn’t believe it until now. “Anywhere we need to stop on the way to your place V?” He asked, pulling out of the parking lot carefully, being in cars, especially one as big as this still made him kind of nervous although he had to admit this vehicle handled better then most but was nothing compared to the freedom given to him by a motorcycle. “Maybe get you some medicine, sleeping pills?” He suggested, concern nagging at him.
Looking at him Veronica’s eyes slid closed for a moment before she managed to fight to get them to open again and she offered him a soft, lazy smile that made something twisted up inside the pit of his stomach unfurl as she shook her head and did up her seatbelt. “No, I’ll be okay Weevil; I’ve just had a hard time of it lately. Between the rapes at Hearts, Dean O’Dell’s death, Tim Foyle, Logan, Parker and Piz I’ve been pretty much ready to put my head through a window for a few weeks now, I just want things to get back to normal.” She explained.
“Veronica, I hate to tell you this, but for you that is kind of normal,” Weevil pressed his foot down a bit harder on the gas, trying to figure out if she would find it weird if he were to just dump her on the door step and hightail it out of there as fast as possible, needing to get away from her. However knowing Veronica it was most likely she would call her dad and report the vehicle as stolen, and Weevil didn’t particularly want to deal with that at the moment. It looked like his luck for the day was Veronica or nothing, and Veronica was decidedly better company, maybe he could manage to stop thinking about her for five seconds at a time if he was actually with her…And that didn’t make much sense to him either. He shook his head to clear it and kept his eyes focused on the road ahead, his fingers tightening around the steering wheel.
Smiling at him Veronica nodded, sighing softly she turned to the window, still not talking much which got him even more concerned. “Or is it that you want things to go back to being normal between you and your dad?” He asked her intuitively, knowing that she must feel a little bit awkward having her dad suddenly back as Sheriff again. “Must admit, never liked Lamb much, but he didn’t deserve to die the way he did.”
“You’re right you know,” Veronica turned back towards him, catching his eyes with her own when they stopped at a red light, he found himself unable to look away but still listened intently. “I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop, I mean, I love my dad but this feels wrong, him being Sheriff now that Lilly’s gone, now that Lamb is gone, and I can’t shake the feeling that this isn’t how it’s meant to be. I think that my dad was meant to be a PI, just like me, I mean why else would he have been able to score a 97 percent on the test, it just doesn’t make sense to me and to be honest it’s driving me a little bit crazy.”
Weevil nodded, turning the corner he lessened his grip on the wheel, calmer now that they actually had something to talk about and he had less time to think about how much he wanted to touch the girl in the seat next to him. “I can tell, you’re finally somewhere where you are absolutely content with your life in certain aspects, especially that of being a PI and now your dad is Sheriff again and it’s like an attempt to drag your life back to what it was before Lilly’s death,” He spouted out, unable to stop himself from doing so. Normally he preferred not to get into serious conversations with anyone, he hadn’t since Felix had died, an event that had almost crushed him even more then the betrayal of the PCH, yet Weevil always found himself getting into conversations with Veronica Mars that had something more behind them then pointless ‘how are you’s.
“Exactly, I never realized you were so smart,” Veronica snapped her fingers together then it seemed to sink in that she had actually just said that out loud and a look of mortification passed over her face and she reached out, resting her hand against his forearm. “Weevil I didn’t mean that, I mean I never thought you were stupid, I just meant…” She trailed off, appearing to be at a loss for words and he couldn’t help the smile that lit up his face when he saw it.
“You’re just not used to me having the answers to what you’re thinking unless it has something to do with being the “local crime element” I believe the Sheriff likes to call it,” Weevil almost flinched away from her touch at first, but settled back into the seat, not wanting her to notice something was up because knowing her she would then start digging for clues and not let until she had all the answers to what was going on with him.
Veronica squeezed his arm lightly and then moved her hand back into her lap, “I’m still sorry. You may have made foolish decisions in the past but whenever I thought of you as stupid I was wrong, although admittedly that was usually following you pissing me off in one way or another,” There was a sardonic smile on her face that warmed his insides. When on earth had Eli “Weevil” Navarro become such a softy when it came to little blond girls. “Why do you keep shaking your head like that?”
Huh? Weevil’s cheeks flushed and he turned away, quickly moving the car around into the parking lot of her apartment complex he realized he had been shaking his head when talking to himself. Great, good job in not letting Veronica know there is anything wrong at all. “I’ve been thinking a lot, arguing with myself I guess you could say.”
“What about?” Weevil might've known that Veronica wouldn’t be able to resist asking that question, her head tilted to the side and her eyes wide as she studied him, trying to figure out what it was he could possibly be arguing with himself about. “What motorcycle you’re going to buy next?” She teases lightly because it seems like suddenly she knows the answer and doesn’t want to know it any longer, that panicked look she got sometimes when she looked into Echolls’ eyes.
Weevil unbuckles his seat belt and smiled grimly, “Nothing you need to worry about for now V, and I don’t think I’ll be buying a bike anytime soon but it is possible,” He slides out of the vehicle and waits for her, wrapping an arm carefully around her waist when she stumbled into him, clearly even more tired then she appeared to be. “You alright there girl?” He asked, worry making his forehead crease.
Veronica nodded but wrapped her arm around his waist as well, effectively trapping his arm around her, leaning into him as he basically held her up as they walked to the apartment. “I’m okay, just don’t feel so good,” She murmured softly, “Been so stressed lately.” She explained further even as her eyes drooped and her movements became more sluggish.
Nodding Weevil found the key to the apartment door and unlocked it, helping her into the small home her and the Sheriff lived in, “How late is your dad working tonight?” He questioned, licking his lips quickly and swallowing, his whole mouth feeling dry as he helped her towards her bedroom, remembering where it was from one night when he had helped her home after she’d twisted an ankle on a case, but her dad had been in the house then, a large barrier between them, well him and his gun.
Pushing open the door to her room Veronica stumbled towards the bed, sitting down on it she almost fell when the waterbed swayed underneath her, pulling off her little sweater and her shoes, then her pants, wearing a little pair of boy short panties underneath before she crawled under the sheets, “He said he wouldn’t be back until tomorrow.” She mumbled, already drifting off to sleep now, her eyelids sliding closed. “Why is that so important?”
Weevil was concerned, he rubbed his hand lightly across her forehead surprised at how heated her skin felt at the moment. “Because I think you might be coming down with something V, and it’s never good to be alone when you’re sick. So you stay here and sleep, I’ll go by my place and grab a bag and pick you up some medicine or something, maybe some of that vapour rub shit,” He pulled the blankets up over her, and pushed some hair out of her face. “Do you mind if I take your vehicle to do that?” He looked at her sheepishly, embarrassed that he still had to take the public bus to get everywhere when only a year ago he’d had a powerful machine between his legs and a group of boys willing to die for him, or so he thought.
“No problem, just make sure you set the alarm and lock the door on your way out,” Veronica burrowed down into the sheets sleepily, already drifting into sleep by the time he had reached the door of her bedroom, he realized he didn’t know how to set the alarm when he got there then remembered something from the last time he had been here. He keyed in the date of Lily’s death and was satisfied when it beeped into action; it seemed no matter what happened in his life and where he went that everything came back to that day.
Shaking his head Weevil locked the door behind him and made his way to the vehicle, thoughts consuming him as he steered out of the lot on his way to his own apartment, he wished he could even afford a place like Veronica lived in but knew that was unlikely to happen anytime soon. He thought idly of times when he had talked to Felix about the two of them starting out on their own in an apartment where they could bring girls back, not having to worry about family constantly marching through the house and interrupting whatever could be going on in their bedrooms. He could remember Felix’s funeral like it was yesterday, seeing his best friend’s mother sobbing her heart out like it would never be the same again, because she had lost the only son she had left, for the same reasons she had lost her eldest. Weevil had tried to go to her, to apologize to her but she had just shaken her head at him, a look of helplessness in her eyes, of disappointment because he had always promised to look after Felix, promised to keep him safe. But now, things were different, Weevil was harder, especially after his time in prison, he knew now where naïveté could get a person, dead just like Felix and somewhat the personality of Weevil, leader of the PCH.
Pushing open the door to Veronica’s apartment a little while later Weevil juggled the bags in his hands, managing to punch in the alarm code before it could go off and wake up Veronica, he didn’t even know why he was doing this for sure. He hadn’t ever taken care of anyone other then family when they were sick and it took a lot for him to admit that he might see the little blond sleuth in the same respect as he did a family member. Sighing he made his way through the apartment, putting popsicles in the freezer and some vapour rub in the fridge. He pulled out a cup of soup, pouring it into a bowl he popped it into the microwave without even thinking, going through the actions automatically.
“Looks whose in my kitchen being a little homemaker,” Veronica smiled at him from the doorway of her room, still looking haggard and worn-out but Weevil could see the sparkle in her eyes that suggested that she wouldn’t be down for long, he should have known better then to think she would let something like a cold or the flu knock her down. She just wasn’t the type of person to do that and he should've known. “If I’d known you were like this I would have invited you over every time I got even a little sick, my dad’s not so good at taking care of people,” She sat down in one of the chairs at the island, leaning on the counter.
Weevil leaned on the counter across from her, reaching across to tuck a piece of hair behind her ear before he could even stop himself from doing it, “I usually take care of Ophelia when she’s sick, don’t like to see anyone I care about sick,” He explained, pulling the bowl of soup out of the microwave he set it down in front of her, managing to find a spoon. “So anytime you need me to pick up anything for you when you’re sick just gimme a call and make sure you do that damned head tilt thing when I arrive,” He smiled briefly.
Veronica tilted her head to the side and smiled slightly, “In that case do you think you can get me a slice of bread with butter on it?” She flipped her hair and laughed softly, before digging into her soup. He couldn’t help but grin back at her; she was certainly a girl that could keep him on his toes, that’s for sure. “Good thing the office is closed today,” She remarked.
Walking to the fridge Weevil quickly did what she asked, moving effectively around the kitchen now that he had an idea where things were and put the bread in front of her, “Yeah, it certainly is, because no offence V, you look like shit. It seems like you haven’t slept in weeks or something,” He sat down in the stool, worry still nagging at his insides.
“I haven’t really,” Veronica’s voice was soft and she slowly lowered the spoon back into the dish, her eyes lowered to the countertop as she made little designs with her finger tip. “It’s been a really bad year,” She murmured in a tone of voice that was so lost he felt like holding her in his arms for hours on end, just trying to comfort her in any way he knew how.
Weevil took the bowl away from her and walked into the living room, setting it on the coffee table he waited for her to join him, sitting on the couch beside her he curled one arm around her shoulders gently, offering her comfort. “You wanna tell me about it V, because to me it seems like the last three years have been pretty shit for you without you having a moment to relax.” He informed her, ignoring how good she felt against his body as she seemed to instinctively curl into his chest.
“I never realized how good of a friend you were until now,” Veronica’s voice was soft as though she was contemplating something, her fingers twisting the fabric of his t-shirt lightly. “I just want to apologize for being kind of bitchy to you in the past; it’s just kind of the way I deal with things. Although I have to say you weren’t too nice to me in the beginning of our little mutual partnership favour giving thing anyway,” She looked at him, her eyes filled with amusement.
Nodding Weevil squeezed her somewhat, marveling at how petite she actually was, her personality had been larger then life usually so he tended to forget her physical limitations a good portion of the time. “I couldn’t, I mean, my boys wouldn’t have exactly liked me pandering to a little white girl who used to be an 09er, Felix didn’t even really understand it the first time around, but at least he stuck up for me when it all came to light.” He licked his lips, his throat feeling dry, “If I could change that I would V, but there’s nothing I can do about it and I won’t apologize for it either and I don’t think that you should apologize for the way you acted around me either, it’s one of the reasons our relationship has been so interesting.” He rubbed her shoulder gently. “And don’t think I didn’t notice that you avoided my offer to listen either.”
“Damn,” Veronica snapped her fingers together and sighed, “I still miss Lilly sometimes you know?” She rested her head on his shoulder; shifting around on the couch she watched the steam rise from the bowl of soup, no longer feeling hungry. “Especially when things are really bad, because even when they were bad before, when my mum was drinking she could always find something good for me to see, something better for my life to turn out to be.” She sighed softly, a bone heavy sigh, one reflecting everything wrong within her. “She could always make me laugh and smile, even when things were at their worst. I think that would have been pissed by how much I let the investigation into her death consume me.”
Weevil twirled a piece of her hair around his finger idly, nodding. “I miss her too, mostly for the same reasons, and at other times I resent her because of how much she was able to tear me up inside, like maybe if I had never been with her their never would have been a weakening in the PCH and I would still have my old life or somethin’, I try not to think about her so much anymore,” That was a lie, he thought about her regularly but didn’t particularly want Veronica to know that.
Veronica nodded, “I don’t think I’ve been the same since she died, I think in someway it broke something inside me and since then I’ve been fighting to get it back, I know how stupid that sounds and that’s why I don’t like talking about it.” She shrugged her shoulders, almost slumping against him after her admission. “If Lilly had been there then I never would have gotten raped by Cassidy.” Her voice was barely above a whisper, “And maybe I would’ve ended up going to Stanford after all, is it wrong of me to resent her for dying? Because maybe if she hadn’t gotten involved with Aaron in the first place she would have never died, and none of the shit that’s happened in my life would’ve happened and I might actually be happy right now instead of feeling like I’m drowning all the time.” He didn’t know what to say at first because now it seemed like a dam had broken open and she couldn’t stop; he didn’t want her to if she needed to talk.
“I would have killed him had I known V, as it is I found out about that whole thing way too late, after I had been put in my cell. Lamb seemed almost happy to tell me about it,” Weevil’s right hand clenched into a fist, suddenly with the urge to beat the man for everything he had ever done to possibly hurt Veronica. “You have the same resentment towards Lilly that I do, and it’s okay because it’s what happens whenever anyone dies.” He fought down his anger, realizing Veronica didn’t need to deal with that right now.
Veronica smiled softly, “You’re such a good friend, I’d like to think you’d check up on me first before attempting to kill anyone for me though, not like Logan when he gets into psychotic jackass mode.” She sighed at the mention of her ex-boyfriend even though it was partially her fault their relationship was so bad at the moment.
Weevil nods, gritting his teeth because he’s always hated her and Logan together, Echolls with his stupid puppy dog eyes and attitude, seeming so fucking broken that at times even Weevil himself wants to put the other man back together. “I don’t particularly want to talk about Echolls.” Every time he thought about the way Echolls had paraded around with Veronica on his arm as though she was some sort of prize to be won, or even worse bought. “What happened with that other guy? Piz or something?”
“I broke up with him, he was just too…nice,” Veronica muttered, almost grudgingly like Piz was the last thing she wanted to be talking about right now. “It was like he didn’t really belong here, in Neptune, or with me at all.” She moved closer to him, now practically in his lap, something that made him squirm the slightest bit before he was able to settle down again.
Understanding Weevil nodded his head; guys like Piz could get eaten alive in Neptune if they weren’t careful. They were a dime a dozen in Neptune, not only guys but people who had been touched by nothing, none of the corruption or indecency that took place in the city limits. “You broke up with him to protect him then?” He peered into her face, wanting honesty from her.
“Not just that, I didn’t…I didn’t feel the same for him as I have for other guys I’ve dated. It’s like I went out with him because I knew there was little chance he would hurt or betray me in any way, and then I realized that and just how wrong that is. It would be like using Wallace or something, well even worse then I’ve used him in the past and I just couldn’t do it anymore,” Veronica sighed, obviously tired now she rested her head on his shoulder, one arm curling around his waist gently. “I know you don’t want to hear about it but with Duncan it was kind of like that too, dating him was trying to get back to the way things had been before when I felt safe, and then Logan was like a burning love, one that could eat me up inside.”
Weevil nodded again, finding himself doing that a lot he smiled almost sheepishly and pushed a piece of hair out of her face, “Your soup is probably cold by now, do you want me to warm it up for you?” He questioned, rising from his position at her nod he went into the kitchen carefully carrying the bowl to not spill any of the soup he put it in the microwave and leaned against the counter. He took a deep calming breath trying to calm his body’s response to having Veronica so close to him for quite a bit, it was almost overwhelming how intoxicating her presence was to him at times. He sighed running a hand over his head he moved quickly when the microwave beeped, heading back into the living room. Putting the soup down he smiled slightly at seeing Veronica sprawled out on the couch asleep he gently covered her with a blanket and kissed her forehead, “Dulce del sueño V,” He murmured softly before moving to sit in the seat diagonal from the couch and turned on the television turning it down low so as to not wake her. “I’ll still be here when you wake up.”
Fandom: Veronica Mars
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: The disclaimer can be found in my profile. To put it simply don't own, don't sue.
Summary: Veronica has had a lot to think about lately, and when she runs into Weevil one day in the hallway she finds she has a lot more to think about, like why she can't stop watching him no matter what he does.
Previously on Veronica Mars: Veronica broke up with Piz and thought about everything that had gone wrong in her life before running into Weevil in the hallway. Weevil, seeing Veronica needed some company hung out with her for lunch then drove her home.
Weevil often wonders if there was ever a time he didn’t go running when some little blond came running and tilted her head in his direction, after a while he just gives up on trying to decide that because before Veronica he had Lilly to tilt her head in his direction and he drooled like some dog ready to mate, like Backup or something. He often finds himself with many time to stop and think of Lilly Kane lately, when he’s lying in his cheap little apartment at night, surrounded by cats…no that’s the lady next door. But he does lie there and just think, with nothing but Jay Leno playing late on the television, he hates his job, surrounded by kids his own age who are far too naïve, far too pretty and remind him far too much of the 09ers in high school despite the fact that half of them are almost as poor as he is due to the fees they have to pay for school. At least they have dorms to stay in at night instead of a little apartment that seems like it’s going to fall over the next time there is a strong gust of wind. He could practically hear Lilly laughing at him some of the time, whispering in his ear, her voice mocking just like it used to be, telling him he was even worse off now then before her, she at least would have paid him for what he did for her.It made him sick to even think about her this way because somehow, in his own naïve way at the moment he had loved Lilly, loved how much life had filled her, made him feel like he could be in her world, a world where everyone just lived and had fun without thinking of the consequences. Sometimes when he closed his eyes he could see her body, lifeless and so completely wrong next to the Kane’s pool, a pool where she had made him skinny dip and done decidedly unconventional things with him underwater other then swimming and there she had been, across computer screens all over the school, murdered by someone who didn’t even deserve to lick the bottom of her expensive shoes. Aaron Echolls, to look at him Weevil almost understood why Logan was so fucked up, why he had no idea of how to treat a girl, especially a girl as special as V. Logan hadn’t even really known how to handle Lilly and Weevil tried not to think about that too much, that maybe if Aaron hadn’t fucked up his son so much, then Logan and Lilly would have stopped playing their little games. The what ifs that swam through his head were endless at times it seemed, because maybe if they hadn’t played those games and Weevil had never slept with Lilly, hadn’t helped her cheat, she wouldn’t have gone to Aaron and would have stayed with Logan and never would have died. Despite himself he knows that this cannot be true, that although he can be blamed for a lot that went wrong in Neptune he didn’t have anything to do with how Lilly died, she had done whatever she wanted to do.
He remembered the first time he had seen her, he hadn’t actually thought she was anything special, she was a tiny little thing at the age of thirteen and he was more distracted by the girl who had been with her. Veronica Mars, her knees scraped from playing soccer, kicking the ball around the yard, he had caught it when she kicked it out-of-bounds and gave it back to her, his curly hair falling into his eyes. She had thanked him, those pretty eyes sparkling and her cheeks flushing as she took it from him. He’d opened his mouth to reply when Chardo walked over, quickly rushing him away from the white girl and back to the rest of the junior PCH, within a week he was no longer junior anymore; His head was shaved and he was brought in, just in time for freshman year, just in time for him to be bred into a leader. But he could never forget looking back and seeing Lilly teasing Veronica, the younger girl’s cheeks a flaming red and he wanted to run over and protect her because he knew girls like Lilly in his neighborhood, they wouldn’t let up ever. In the end though Lilly had come after him, wanting an out from her relationship with Logan apparently, even though she never really ended up telling Echolls about them, wanting to keep it her little secret. Her dirty little secret. It wasn’t until she died that he got to actually say a word to Veronica Mars again, and when he had he’d been surprised, she had fire behind her eyes and a passion that he had never expected. It had intrigued him day one, when he had offered her a ride on his hog.
Sometimes when Eli was alone he would close his eyes and imagine what it would feel like to be good enough for girls like Lilly, girls like Veronica Mars. They were the type of girl who had a degree of class, girls who would end up going some place in the world without what they had done in the past coming back to haunt them like it could him. Lilly could’ve gotten away from Neptune eventually, he imagined she would have been an actress or something just as good, possibly a model as she had been good looking enough for either job and she certainly did have a flair for the dramatic. He thinks on the odd occasion that she would have loved the circus that surrounded her death, how everyone got involved and everyone was a suspect except the man who had actually killed her, till the very end when shy little Veronica had solved the case. On the other hand he figures that Lilly would have given Duncan and Echolls shit for the way they had treated her, allowed her to be walked all over by everyone who had once claimed to be her friend. It all came down to the facts, Lilly may not have loved him, and she may not have loved Logan but she had loved and treasured Veronica, wanting to change her into something greater and in a way Lilly had changed her into something greater, just maybe not the way she had planned to. And of course when he thought of Lilly his thoughts automatically turned to Veronica, he found himself thinking of her when he was working more often then not, remembering that day so that seemed like a million years ago when she pulled out her first “Get out of Jail free” card for him, one of many and he’d been so happy that she’d cared, that she had his back that he couldn’t resist giving her a little love. She’d smelt of shampoo, and peaches, something that seemed to match her complexion, not that he would ever mention that to anyone.
Weevil tried not to fall for her like he had for Lilly, knowing he couldn’t stand to be used again like he had in the past, it was just too hard for him to handle again. He knew Veronica would never deliberately try and hurt one of his friends yet it seemed to happen every so often, like she got so involved in the cases and studying the people around her that she forgot that sometimes people did trust others enough to simply answer questions. Everything was a puzzle to be worked out for Veronica Mars, and he had to admit that he now found it more endearing then annoying. Despite himself, and his mind’s need to keep his heart in tact his heart just wasn’t listening to him and even though he knew it would get him in trouble one day, most likely with the law he was unable to stop himself from jumping when she asked him to. He tried, he really did but even when she called him to cube of all people, Madison Sinclair’s care he could hear the anger in her voice and practically picture that infuriating head tilt and couldn’t stop himself from caving. It wasn’t until a little while later when he ran into her in the hallway and saw how tired she looked that he felt guilty for having avoided their twice weekly lunches in an effort to forget his feelings for her. He couldn’t resist saying yes to her and next thing he knew he was also going to her house to take care of her because she just looked plain sick and tired of everything going on, he definitely couldn’t say no to her and right now didn’t want to because he realized she considered him to uncomplicated, showed how little she actually knew about him, how much he hid from her, yet couldn’t hide from him.
Weevil led the way out to the car this time, holding the door open from her he slipped an arm around her waist when she seemed to stumble, falling against his side. He ignored the thrill that went up his spine and tightened his arm around her shoulders in comfort, “Give me the keys V,” He instructed, peering down into her face he squinted trying to see if she was really sick, if she felt hot to the touch without her actually realizing what she was doing. “I’ll drive, prefer to get home in one piece and the Sheriff would kill me if you didn’t.” He teased lightly, knowing she didn’t really take well to being ordered around.
Veronica didn’t say anything, just leaned into him, a testament to how exhausted she was. She fished in her pocket for a moment, a look of confusion on his face that was so cute that the need to kiss her, not even on the lips was almost unbearable for him. Eventually she found them in her bag and pressed the unlock button before giving them to him and climbing into the passenger seat of the SUV.
Fingering the keys for a moment Weevil took a deep breath before climbing into the SUV as well; sliding the key into the ignition he smiled at her briefly, having never seen her like this. She looked like she was ready to bury herself in the covers of her bed and never come out, he’d heard Fennel joke around that Veronica Mars was nothing but a marshmallow but hadn’t believe it until now. “Anywhere we need to stop on the way to your place V?” He asked, pulling out of the parking lot carefully, being in cars, especially one as big as this still made him kind of nervous although he had to admit this vehicle handled better then most but was nothing compared to the freedom given to him by a motorcycle. “Maybe get you some medicine, sleeping pills?” He suggested, concern nagging at him.
Looking at him Veronica’s eyes slid closed for a moment before she managed to fight to get them to open again and she offered him a soft, lazy smile that made something twisted up inside the pit of his stomach unfurl as she shook her head and did up her seatbelt. “No, I’ll be okay Weevil; I’ve just had a hard time of it lately. Between the rapes at Hearts, Dean O’Dell’s death, Tim Foyle, Logan, Parker and Piz I’ve been pretty much ready to put my head through a window for a few weeks now, I just want things to get back to normal.” She explained.
“Veronica, I hate to tell you this, but for you that is kind of normal,” Weevil pressed his foot down a bit harder on the gas, trying to figure out if she would find it weird if he were to just dump her on the door step and hightail it out of there as fast as possible, needing to get away from her. However knowing Veronica it was most likely she would call her dad and report the vehicle as stolen, and Weevil didn’t particularly want to deal with that at the moment. It looked like his luck for the day was Veronica or nothing, and Veronica was decidedly better company, maybe he could manage to stop thinking about her for five seconds at a time if he was actually with her…And that didn’t make much sense to him either. He shook his head to clear it and kept his eyes focused on the road ahead, his fingers tightening around the steering wheel.
Smiling at him Veronica nodded, sighing softly she turned to the window, still not talking much which got him even more concerned. “Or is it that you want things to go back to being normal between you and your dad?” He asked her intuitively, knowing that she must feel a little bit awkward having her dad suddenly back as Sheriff again. “Must admit, never liked Lamb much, but he didn’t deserve to die the way he did.”
“You’re right you know,” Veronica turned back towards him, catching his eyes with her own when they stopped at a red light, he found himself unable to look away but still listened intently. “I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop, I mean, I love my dad but this feels wrong, him being Sheriff now that Lilly’s gone, now that Lamb is gone, and I can’t shake the feeling that this isn’t how it’s meant to be. I think that my dad was meant to be a PI, just like me, I mean why else would he have been able to score a 97 percent on the test, it just doesn’t make sense to me and to be honest it’s driving me a little bit crazy.”
Weevil nodded, turning the corner he lessened his grip on the wheel, calmer now that they actually had something to talk about and he had less time to think about how much he wanted to touch the girl in the seat next to him. “I can tell, you’re finally somewhere where you are absolutely content with your life in certain aspects, especially that of being a PI and now your dad is Sheriff again and it’s like an attempt to drag your life back to what it was before Lilly’s death,” He spouted out, unable to stop himself from doing so. Normally he preferred not to get into serious conversations with anyone, he hadn’t since Felix had died, an event that had almost crushed him even more then the betrayal of the PCH, yet Weevil always found himself getting into conversations with Veronica Mars that had something more behind them then pointless ‘how are you’s.
“Exactly, I never realized you were so smart,” Veronica snapped her fingers together then it seemed to sink in that she had actually just said that out loud and a look of mortification passed over her face and she reached out, resting her hand against his forearm. “Weevil I didn’t mean that, I mean I never thought you were stupid, I just meant…” She trailed off, appearing to be at a loss for words and he couldn’t help the smile that lit up his face when he saw it.
“You’re just not used to me having the answers to what you’re thinking unless it has something to do with being the “local crime element” I believe the Sheriff likes to call it,” Weevil almost flinched away from her touch at first, but settled back into the seat, not wanting her to notice something was up because knowing her she would then start digging for clues and not let until she had all the answers to what was going on with him.
Veronica squeezed his arm lightly and then moved her hand back into her lap, “I’m still sorry. You may have made foolish decisions in the past but whenever I thought of you as stupid I was wrong, although admittedly that was usually following you pissing me off in one way or another,” There was a sardonic smile on her face that warmed his insides. When on earth had Eli “Weevil” Navarro become such a softy when it came to little blond girls. “Why do you keep shaking your head like that?”
Huh? Weevil’s cheeks flushed and he turned away, quickly moving the car around into the parking lot of her apartment complex he realized he had been shaking his head when talking to himself. Great, good job in not letting Veronica know there is anything wrong at all. “I’ve been thinking a lot, arguing with myself I guess you could say.”
“What about?” Weevil might've known that Veronica wouldn’t be able to resist asking that question, her head tilted to the side and her eyes wide as she studied him, trying to figure out what it was he could possibly be arguing with himself about. “What motorcycle you’re going to buy next?” She teases lightly because it seems like suddenly she knows the answer and doesn’t want to know it any longer, that panicked look she got sometimes when she looked into Echolls’ eyes.
Weevil unbuckles his seat belt and smiled grimly, “Nothing you need to worry about for now V, and I don’t think I’ll be buying a bike anytime soon but it is possible,” He slides out of the vehicle and waits for her, wrapping an arm carefully around her waist when she stumbled into him, clearly even more tired then she appeared to be. “You alright there girl?” He asked, worry making his forehead crease.
Veronica nodded but wrapped her arm around his waist as well, effectively trapping his arm around her, leaning into him as he basically held her up as they walked to the apartment. “I’m okay, just don’t feel so good,” She murmured softly, “Been so stressed lately.” She explained further even as her eyes drooped and her movements became more sluggish.
Nodding Weevil found the key to the apartment door and unlocked it, helping her into the small home her and the Sheriff lived in, “How late is your dad working tonight?” He questioned, licking his lips quickly and swallowing, his whole mouth feeling dry as he helped her towards her bedroom, remembering where it was from one night when he had helped her home after she’d twisted an ankle on a case, but her dad had been in the house then, a large barrier between them, well him and his gun.
Pushing open the door to her room Veronica stumbled towards the bed, sitting down on it she almost fell when the waterbed swayed underneath her, pulling off her little sweater and her shoes, then her pants, wearing a little pair of boy short panties underneath before she crawled under the sheets, “He said he wouldn’t be back until tomorrow.” She mumbled, already drifting off to sleep now, her eyelids sliding closed. “Why is that so important?”
Weevil was concerned, he rubbed his hand lightly across her forehead surprised at how heated her skin felt at the moment. “Because I think you might be coming down with something V, and it’s never good to be alone when you’re sick. So you stay here and sleep, I’ll go by my place and grab a bag and pick you up some medicine or something, maybe some of that vapour rub shit,” He pulled the blankets up over her, and pushed some hair out of her face. “Do you mind if I take your vehicle to do that?” He looked at her sheepishly, embarrassed that he still had to take the public bus to get everywhere when only a year ago he’d had a powerful machine between his legs and a group of boys willing to die for him, or so he thought.
“No problem, just make sure you set the alarm and lock the door on your way out,” Veronica burrowed down into the sheets sleepily, already drifting into sleep by the time he had reached the door of her bedroom, he realized he didn’t know how to set the alarm when he got there then remembered something from the last time he had been here. He keyed in the date of Lily’s death and was satisfied when it beeped into action; it seemed no matter what happened in his life and where he went that everything came back to that day.
Shaking his head Weevil locked the door behind him and made his way to the vehicle, thoughts consuming him as he steered out of the lot on his way to his own apartment, he wished he could even afford a place like Veronica lived in but knew that was unlikely to happen anytime soon. He thought idly of times when he had talked to Felix about the two of them starting out on their own in an apartment where they could bring girls back, not having to worry about family constantly marching through the house and interrupting whatever could be going on in their bedrooms. He could remember Felix’s funeral like it was yesterday, seeing his best friend’s mother sobbing her heart out like it would never be the same again, because she had lost the only son she had left, for the same reasons she had lost her eldest. Weevil had tried to go to her, to apologize to her but she had just shaken her head at him, a look of helplessness in her eyes, of disappointment because he had always promised to look after Felix, promised to keep him safe. But now, things were different, Weevil was harder, especially after his time in prison, he knew now where naïveté could get a person, dead just like Felix and somewhat the personality of Weevil, leader of the PCH.
Pushing open the door to Veronica’s apartment a little while later Weevil juggled the bags in his hands, managing to punch in the alarm code before it could go off and wake up Veronica, he didn’t even know why he was doing this for sure. He hadn’t ever taken care of anyone other then family when they were sick and it took a lot for him to admit that he might see the little blond sleuth in the same respect as he did a family member. Sighing he made his way through the apartment, putting popsicles in the freezer and some vapour rub in the fridge. He pulled out a cup of soup, pouring it into a bowl he popped it into the microwave without even thinking, going through the actions automatically.
“Looks whose in my kitchen being a little homemaker,” Veronica smiled at him from the doorway of her room, still looking haggard and worn-out but Weevil could see the sparkle in her eyes that suggested that she wouldn’t be down for long, he should have known better then to think she would let something like a cold or the flu knock her down. She just wasn’t the type of person to do that and he should've known. “If I’d known you were like this I would have invited you over every time I got even a little sick, my dad’s not so good at taking care of people,” She sat down in one of the chairs at the island, leaning on the counter.
Weevil leaned on the counter across from her, reaching across to tuck a piece of hair behind her ear before he could even stop himself from doing it, “I usually take care of Ophelia when she’s sick, don’t like to see anyone I care about sick,” He explained, pulling the bowl of soup out of the microwave he set it down in front of her, managing to find a spoon. “So anytime you need me to pick up anything for you when you’re sick just gimme a call and make sure you do that damned head tilt thing when I arrive,” He smiled briefly.
Veronica tilted her head to the side and smiled slightly, “In that case do you think you can get me a slice of bread with butter on it?” She flipped her hair and laughed softly, before digging into her soup. He couldn’t help but grin back at her; she was certainly a girl that could keep him on his toes, that’s for sure. “Good thing the office is closed today,” She remarked.
Walking to the fridge Weevil quickly did what she asked, moving effectively around the kitchen now that he had an idea where things were and put the bread in front of her, “Yeah, it certainly is, because no offence V, you look like shit. It seems like you haven’t slept in weeks or something,” He sat down in the stool, worry still nagging at his insides.
“I haven’t really,” Veronica’s voice was soft and she slowly lowered the spoon back into the dish, her eyes lowered to the countertop as she made little designs with her finger tip. “It’s been a really bad year,” She murmured in a tone of voice that was so lost he felt like holding her in his arms for hours on end, just trying to comfort her in any way he knew how.
Weevil took the bowl away from her and walked into the living room, setting it on the coffee table he waited for her to join him, sitting on the couch beside her he curled one arm around her shoulders gently, offering her comfort. “You wanna tell me about it V, because to me it seems like the last three years have been pretty shit for you without you having a moment to relax.” He informed her, ignoring how good she felt against his body as she seemed to instinctively curl into his chest.
“I never realized how good of a friend you were until now,” Veronica’s voice was soft as though she was contemplating something, her fingers twisting the fabric of his t-shirt lightly. “I just want to apologize for being kind of bitchy to you in the past; it’s just kind of the way I deal with things. Although I have to say you weren’t too nice to me in the beginning of our little mutual partnership favour giving thing anyway,” She looked at him, her eyes filled with amusement.
Nodding Weevil squeezed her somewhat, marveling at how petite she actually was, her personality had been larger then life usually so he tended to forget her physical limitations a good portion of the time. “I couldn’t, I mean, my boys wouldn’t have exactly liked me pandering to a little white girl who used to be an 09er, Felix didn’t even really understand it the first time around, but at least he stuck up for me when it all came to light.” He licked his lips, his throat feeling dry, “If I could change that I would V, but there’s nothing I can do about it and I won’t apologize for it either and I don’t think that you should apologize for the way you acted around me either, it’s one of the reasons our relationship has been so interesting.” He rubbed her shoulder gently. “And don’t think I didn’t notice that you avoided my offer to listen either.”
“Damn,” Veronica snapped her fingers together and sighed, “I still miss Lilly sometimes you know?” She rested her head on his shoulder; shifting around on the couch she watched the steam rise from the bowl of soup, no longer feeling hungry. “Especially when things are really bad, because even when they were bad before, when my mum was drinking she could always find something good for me to see, something better for my life to turn out to be.” She sighed softly, a bone heavy sigh, one reflecting everything wrong within her. “She could always make me laugh and smile, even when things were at their worst. I think that would have been pissed by how much I let the investigation into her death consume me.”
Weevil twirled a piece of her hair around his finger idly, nodding. “I miss her too, mostly for the same reasons, and at other times I resent her because of how much she was able to tear me up inside, like maybe if I had never been with her their never would have been a weakening in the PCH and I would still have my old life or somethin’, I try not to think about her so much anymore,” That was a lie, he thought about her regularly but didn’t particularly want Veronica to know that.
Veronica nodded, “I don’t think I’ve been the same since she died, I think in someway it broke something inside me and since then I’ve been fighting to get it back, I know how stupid that sounds and that’s why I don’t like talking about it.” She shrugged her shoulders, almost slumping against him after her admission. “If Lilly had been there then I never would have gotten raped by Cassidy.” Her voice was barely above a whisper, “And maybe I would’ve ended up going to Stanford after all, is it wrong of me to resent her for dying? Because maybe if she hadn’t gotten involved with Aaron in the first place she would have never died, and none of the shit that’s happened in my life would’ve happened and I might actually be happy right now instead of feeling like I’m drowning all the time.” He didn’t know what to say at first because now it seemed like a dam had broken open and she couldn’t stop; he didn’t want her to if she needed to talk.
“I would have killed him had I known V, as it is I found out about that whole thing way too late, after I had been put in my cell. Lamb seemed almost happy to tell me about it,” Weevil’s right hand clenched into a fist, suddenly with the urge to beat the man for everything he had ever done to possibly hurt Veronica. “You have the same resentment towards Lilly that I do, and it’s okay because it’s what happens whenever anyone dies.” He fought down his anger, realizing Veronica didn’t need to deal with that right now.
Veronica smiled softly, “You’re such a good friend, I’d like to think you’d check up on me first before attempting to kill anyone for me though, not like Logan when he gets into psychotic jackass mode.” She sighed at the mention of her ex-boyfriend even though it was partially her fault their relationship was so bad at the moment.
Weevil nods, gritting his teeth because he’s always hated her and Logan together, Echolls with his stupid puppy dog eyes and attitude, seeming so fucking broken that at times even Weevil himself wants to put the other man back together. “I don’t particularly want to talk about Echolls.” Every time he thought about the way Echolls had paraded around with Veronica on his arm as though she was some sort of prize to be won, or even worse bought. “What happened with that other guy? Piz or something?”
“I broke up with him, he was just too…nice,” Veronica muttered, almost grudgingly like Piz was the last thing she wanted to be talking about right now. “It was like he didn’t really belong here, in Neptune, or with me at all.” She moved closer to him, now practically in his lap, something that made him squirm the slightest bit before he was able to settle down again.
Understanding Weevil nodded his head; guys like Piz could get eaten alive in Neptune if they weren’t careful. They were a dime a dozen in Neptune, not only guys but people who had been touched by nothing, none of the corruption or indecency that took place in the city limits. “You broke up with him to protect him then?” He peered into her face, wanting honesty from her.
“Not just that, I didn’t…I didn’t feel the same for him as I have for other guys I’ve dated. It’s like I went out with him because I knew there was little chance he would hurt or betray me in any way, and then I realized that and just how wrong that is. It would be like using Wallace or something, well even worse then I’ve used him in the past and I just couldn’t do it anymore,” Veronica sighed, obviously tired now she rested her head on his shoulder, one arm curling around his waist gently. “I know you don’t want to hear about it but with Duncan it was kind of like that too, dating him was trying to get back to the way things had been before when I felt safe, and then Logan was like a burning love, one that could eat me up inside.”
Weevil nodded again, finding himself doing that a lot he smiled almost sheepishly and pushed a piece of hair out of her face, “Your soup is probably cold by now, do you want me to warm it up for you?” He questioned, rising from his position at her nod he went into the kitchen carefully carrying the bowl to not spill any of the soup he put it in the microwave and leaned against the counter. He took a deep calming breath trying to calm his body’s response to having Veronica so close to him for quite a bit, it was almost overwhelming how intoxicating her presence was to him at times. He sighed running a hand over his head he moved quickly when the microwave beeped, heading back into the living room. Putting the soup down he smiled slightly at seeing Veronica sprawled out on the couch asleep he gently covered her with a blanket and kissed her forehead, “Dulce del sueño V,” He murmured softly before moving to sit in the seat diagonal from the couch and turned on the television turning it down low so as to not wake her. “I’ll still be here when you wake up.”
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